Diving deep into our current racial climate

I have heard arguments against the Black Lives Matter movement that basically say Black people should get their shit together. They go something like 'what about Black on Black crime?', 'what about derogatory lyrics in rap?' and say we should focus on those things instead of police brutality and white supremacy. I'm not going to dive into the power dynamics of gas lighting and deflection as tools to detract from an issue - that's a whole other can of worms, but suffice to say deflection and gas lighting are very well known and powerful tools commonly used by abusers in order to perpetuate abuse.

What I will say is that in my experience talking about and teaching about racism, when comments like these occur it is usually from the mouths of people who do not have a deep understanding of the issue.

In order to comprehend why we got to where we are now, you must know the history. This is a crucial foundation. Study the history of how Black people were brought to this country. Study and study it some more. I've been studying deeply for at least 20 years and I'm still learning. Learn about Jim Crow, segregation and red lining. Learn about the 'war on drugs'. For Nova Scotians, learn about the Black Loyalists, learn about Africville, learn about Whitney Pier’s Black community – one which the government's treatment paralleled what that of Africville.

Learn about environmental racism, racism in health care, racism in education. Learn about the power of stripping a people of their heritage - I've heard often throughout the years 'well you guys have a Black history month, why don't we have a white history month?'. Short answer to a complicated question: we don't have a 'white history' month because white values, history and culture are reflected everywhere and in everything in North America. It is interwoven into the fabric of this culture. The fact that we have a month to celebrate Black culture is, in my opinion, not a win. It is a beacon that shines on a very large problem - Black culture, history and achievements, on a societal level, are routinely ignored except for one month out of the year (and the shortest, coldest one at that!). We should not need a Black History month. The history and achievements of Black people should be taught, celebrated and acknowledged every day of the year, as should those of all cultures. Another answer to that question - I have seen lots of celebrations, clubs and organizations that laud white culture, but the term 'white' is not used because, by and large, white people have the privilege of knowing their exact roots. For example we don't say 'white day' we say 'St. Patrick's day" - a day to celebrate elements of Irish heritage. The privilege here being that Irish people know where their ancestors came from. Black people in this country do not have the luxury of knowing exactly where our ancestors came from. We know a continent - Africa - but not a country. If we could say Nigeria or Chad or Ghana, we would. But we cannot. That was stripped away during slavery.

But I digress.

Once you have a deep understanding of the history and current issues, take it a step further and learn about abuse. Learn that abuse is not just physical.

Learn about emotional abuse. Learn about the abuser / abused dynamics. Learn about the cycles of abuse. Learn about brainwashing, deflection, denial, dismissal and gas lighting.

Learn about how abuse is used to control. Learn how isolating and stripping someone of their identity is used as a means to control. Learn and apply these principles back to slavery and our current day situation regarding systematic racism.

One pattern I have noticed is that unless something huge happens in someone's life, they will continue on whatever trajectory they have been going on. You see this all the time in stories that basically go - I was a drug abuser and headed on a downward spiral and then (insert life changing event) happened. Is it that much of a stretch to apply this to issues facing the Black community? Add generations of abuse with a lack of knowledge of and therefore pride in ones culture and therefore one’s self and then add on top of that a system that actively seeks to oppress, and you will begin to scratch the surface of answers to questions like 'what about Black on Black violence' (side note, have you ever noticed when a white person kills another white person it's not called white on white violence? The media engine is at play here influencing how we view crimes perpetuated by Black people) and why there is an issue with drugs in the Black community, single parent Black homes etc.

That said I would contest that these issues also plague white homes and communities, but the media would have us believe that these are issues that affect Black communities moreso than white communities.

Let's get into the history.

During slave times, calculated efforts were made to break slaves. You don't break a person physically, you break them mentally. You break up strong family structures and ensure they cannot be formed. You pit people against each other. You make people hate themselves. When you break a person psychologically, you set in motion a longstanding chain of events.

We've all heard the phrase 'hurt people hurt people'. This applies. If a person is broken, if they hate themselves, if they are constantly fighting an uphill battle and being broken down time and time again, wouldn't it stand to reason that that person's parenting would be compromised? If a broken person raises a child, wouldn't it stand to reason that the child would have additional issues? All parents are broken in some way - they are only human - but my point here is the additional trauma placed on Black people makes the struggle even harder in all aspects of life.

The thing is, in order to fix something that is broken, you have to first acknowledge that it is broken, then know how it was broken and then work your way backward to begin to unravel the complicated tangles that keep someone or something (in this case, society) bound to a trajectory that is no longer working.

So in saying 'what about...' you must understand that those things exist today as a direct result of the machine of systematic racism that was designed to and continues to keep Black people broken. You must also understand that the BLM movement is in place to begin addressing some of those issues in order to fix them.

Learn. Start with Willie Lynch's instructions on how to break a slave and apply what you've learned to current events.

And for those who think - well those days are long past. Pull yourself together already; think about your own life journey. Self improvement is one of the hardest things anyone can achieve in their life. Imagine trying to work on yourself and improve yourself in a hostile environment that has things in place to keep you down. Also consider this, people who are under attack enter something called Fight or Flight mode. People who are in survival mode will have an even harder time improving their life circumstances.

In order to know where you're headed, you've got to know where you've been.
Know thy history, know thyself.

Some resources to start: 

Willie Lynch - the making of a slave

Willie lynch - the making of a slave speach

Light Girls documentary

Dark Girls documentary

The racist legacy of breastfeeding

Confessions of a Former Bastard Cop

"I was a police officer for nearly ten years and I was a bastard. We all were.
This essay has been kicking around in my head for years now and I’ve never felt confident enough to write it. It’s a time in my life I’m ashamed of. It’s a time that I hurt people and, through inaction, allowed others to be hurt. It’s a time that I acted as a violent agent of capitalism and white supremacy. Under the guise of public safety, I personally ruined people’s lives but in so doing, made the public no safer… so did the family members and close friends of mine who also bore the badge alongside me.

But enough is enough.

The reforms aren’t working. Incrementalism isn’t happening. Unarmed Black, indigenous, and people of color are being killed by cops in the streets and the police are savagely attacking the people protesting these murders.

American policing is a thick blue tumor strangling the life from our communities and if you don’t believe it when the poor and the marginalized say it, if you don’t believe it when you see cops across the country shooting journalists with less-lethal bullets and caustic chemicals, maybe you’ll believe it when you hear it straight from the pig’s mouth."

How I Discovered I Am White by

"When I was 14 or so, I asked my grandmother why we didn’t have a “white club” at school. I don’t recall her response, but I do remember feeling particularly smug and vaguely angry that there was a “Latino” club and a “Chinese” club but not a “white” club."

Read this important post.

Racial Injustice has Benefited Me - A Confession by Phil Vischer

"I'm watching America burn, and watching fingers point in all directions.  Of course, I'm not a racist.  I've never kneeled on anyone's neck or denied housing to anyone.  So I'm clean.  Right? 

This situation has me examining how I tell my story, and I am more convinced than ever that how we tell our stories matters.  I have benefited from racial injustice.  How?  Here's my story."

An uneven playing field

Why are black people rioting and looting? Watch. Listen. Learn.

Educate Yourself About the Black Massacres in Tulsa and Rosewood

My White Friend Asked Me on Facebook to Explain White Privilege. I Decided to Be Honest

My White Friend Asked Me on Facebook to Explain White Privilege. I Decided to Be Honest...

This piece is absolutely excellent. Click to read.

Dear brown Canadian woman...

"I have so many questions, but am afraid of asking the wrong person the wrong question." 

Whether or not to approach a POC with a question regarding race / racism and how to do so without causing offense is a question I've been asked many times. And it's a very important topic to address.

I believe in self education. When people take it upon themselves to look into a topic, it shows a real willingness to learn, and also helps lift the burden off of people of colour who may be tired of answering the same questions over and over again.

Educational burnout for POCs is a very real thing, and needs to be acknowledged.

To complicate things, it also needs to be acknowledged that a lot of white people really don't know where to start. They may not know what to look up. And, let's face it, hearing directly from actual people that we know holds more weight than any documentary or article ever could.

So, what to do?

I don't think there is any one definitive answer here. Below I share with you my most recent answer to a good friend. Please don't take this as an all encompassing answer, as there are many ways to approach this question. This is just my opinion.

"You can only learn by asking questions. But white people can be afraid to ask questions for fear of being rude or causing offense. I don't have a definitive answer to this question. 

One piece of advice I can give is wait to see signals - do you know a POC? Do they seem open to the discussion? Have they talked about their experiences before? If so ask, but 'warn' them first. And by that I mean don't just out of the blue spring a question on them and catch them all off guard. And don't ask in a crowd....or at a party...and not when alcohol is involved. Too often I've had well meaning white friends ask during a party when alcohol is involved....bad idea.

I'd approach a person and say 'I have some questions about race/racism but first let me say I totally understand if you don't want to answer. I get you don't have all the answers and can only give your individual POV. Do you mind sharing your opinions with me?"

Then you need to accept a yes or a no. And you need to be prepared that some of the views they share may make you feel uncomfortable. Be open to them correcting you as well.

They might want to get into it right then and there, or they may wait a bit until they are comfortable sharing. They may never want to talk about it or tell their opinions. It is so individual. But if someone doesn't want to open up, don't feel you were wrong to respectfully ask a question.

I also encourage white people to learn as much as they can on their own. That is SO helpful in these types of conversations if white people are trying to learn on their own as well"

You can also ask a POC if they know of any books/documentaries/videos or resources that they would like to share with you.

As a start, I would encourage anyone who is curious to open up Google or YouTube, and type in the name of their community or province followed by the words 'Black History". You will pull up results that talk about the history and noteworthy people of your area that way. Many white people don't know anything about Black history because it is excluded or glossed over if it even is featured in classrooms. Knowing the history is a really great first step into understanding why things are the way they are today. For example many white Canadians do not realize that Canada had slavery and segregation (did you know Nova Scotia had segregated schools until fairly recently? My step-father went to a segregated school). They have never heard of Africville, or Viola Desmond (you know, the lady on the $10 bill? She is commonly referred to as Canada's Rosa Parks). 

The most recent book I've read which I recommend to everyone is Black Cop by Calvin Lawrence. Seriously, if you are interested in knowing more about these topics, this book should be at the top of your list! You can purchase it from Amazon and Chapters, and you can also borrow it from the Halifax Public Library System.

You can also follow this blog and others like it. 

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Dear well meaning white people...

All of my life I have heard from well meaning white folks that racism doesn't exist in Cape Breton. Or that racism doesn't exist in Nova Scotia. Or that racism doesn't exist in Canada. Or that racism is worse in the USA (which is not true, but if it were, would that matter?).

Dear well meaning white people, the next time you feel the need to TELL us ANYTHING about race...DON'T.

ASK us.

ASK us about what we’ve seen and experienced.

ASK us what our lives have been like.

ASK us "does racism still exist?"

ASK your POC friends, co-workers, neighbors and family members what their lives are TRULY like.

Do not assume that just because we haven't shared stories with you that we do not have stories to share. Because I promise you, we most certainly do.

And then if we do choose to share...

Don't get angry at us (don't hate the messenger, hate the message!).

Don't be dismissive (do NOT say we are just sensitive).

Don’t ask if so and so meant to be rude. Maybe so and so did, maybe they didn't. That's not the point. The point is that damage was done.

Don’t assume that only hard core racist people can say or do racist things. Have you ever heard the term 'putting your foot in your mouth'? That can happen here. I have heard non-racist white people say racist things ALL THE TIME. How does this work? First you need to understand that there is a difference between racism and extremism. An extremist is someone who hates another and they may or may not be open about this. However, thanks to systematic racism permeating every aspect of our lives, we are all a little racist. How? We all have unconscious bias which may manifest itself as micro aggressions. It is very common for white people to say or do something racially offensive without meaning to cause offence. 

Don't insult us by wringing your hands and saying "I can't believe this is happening here!" or "But it's 2020!" or "But it's Canada!" (You are only shocked because your white privilege has protected you. Please do not show up centuries late to the oppression party acting all shocked).

Don't say "I never saw/experienced anything" or "racism never happened in my neighborhood" or "none of my friends/family are racist". (Ugly truth alert, were all a little racist. We all have unconscious bias. The only way to truly combat societal ingrained racism is to work to become active anti-racists).

Don't say "I've experienced racism too". No you did not. You experienced racial prejudice. There is a difference. Racial prejudice is when one person or a group of people behaves negatively toward another based on race.  This can happen to anyone. This is one element of racism, but racism as experienced by POCs from white people means the systemic oppression of a race, which POCs can't do to white people. And I promise you, your one or two or...few dozen stories do not hold a candle to our generations worth of stories.

DO NOT (!!) tell us you don't see colour. We are PROUD of our heritage. We want to be SEEN but not in a negative way. We have a different lived experience than white people because of our heritage and that needs to be acknowledged. Do not misguidedly try to white wash us.

Do not assume that there is one voice of colour or we all see or experience things the same. Don't forget we are individuals who have shared experiences regarding racial discrimination. Meaning an experience may affect the next POC differently.

Don't assume one POC has all the answers.

Don't say "why should race matter". I hear what you are trying to say, but you're doing it wrong. Race DOES matter in Canada. It always has. We need to acknowledge that.

Most importantly, do not turn away.

If we choose to open up and share our stories, we may get angry during the telling. This is ok. These stories are angering, as they should be. It's okay to tell us that hearing what happened to us pisses you off, too.

We may cry. This is ok. These stories are deeply upsetting. It's ok to cry with us.

Listen. Offer a hug if the situation warrants it. Tell us "I hear you". Hand us several tissues if needed.

Then go into the world, knowing better, and make sure to correct every well meaning white person you hear say "I don't think racism still exists" or "But not where I live" or "Well I know so and so and they never said anything  to me" or "I don't think so and so meant to be offensive" or "It's worse in the USA" or "Well, I never saw or experienced racism" or "I experienced racism too" or "No one in my family/friend group is like that" or "Not in Canada!"

Every white person you teach helps lift that burden off of our shoulders.

This is one way you can show solidarity. This is one way you can become part of the solution.

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